Discuss your favorite Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey.
LOL . . . alot!
Ouch! It really hurts. I often fall for the tantalizing cheese trap!
I am only posting a comment because I think this is the stupidest Deep Thought I've ever read.
If only the mice listened.
The mice wouldn't consistantly keep getting caught if people would stop putting cheese in those things. It's not really that complicated.
that's deep...but let's go deeper.
My birth gem is Gorgonzola.
My brother's housekeeper's gem is Limburger. But he never told me, and I asked her to leave once, not knowing. If I were her, I'd just say I was born in March, which is, of course, Velveeta.
vera carp would make a very good Jack Handey.......totally random.......and the reason they have lasers around jewels is to protect the jewels, not kill the thiefs, right?(wink wink........nudge nudge)
Oh, Nana...If only thieves were as passionate about cheese, we wouldn't need lasers, now would we? Now THAT'S the kind of world I want to live in! (I read quite a bit about it at cheeseforpeace.com)
Oh, the Vera Carp fan club is growing. But let's appreciate her for her true talents. Is she, and/or, if,to,at,by,for from....... oh, I'm frightened Aunty Em!Are 'they' good merely because they are random? Do you want to live in a random world? One that exploded into existence for no apparent reason? It makes no difference because a nod is as good as a wink to a blind horse.Very makes a good point about the lasers and the cheese, but for myself I'd trade cheesforpeace for a piece of cheese any day! Unless it's a trap!
How delightfully thorough you are, Mr. C! However, animals can be quite clever! As a child, I remember old man Olson had a blind mule, but the poor beast always knew when it was feeding time, even though he couldn't see the hand on a single clock!I'm almost positive that holds true for horses.
Actually Vera, I may call you Vera, can I not? Horses have no use for clocks as a mule does, ironically however they CAN see those hands. Fortunately, old man Olson knew that for a mule a nod is of much greater value than a wink, and this was the means by which he would inform his mule of feeding time.
Right you ARE, Mr. Mule Sense!...for every time old man Olson would wink, the mule would roll over. Why, I remember one hot summer day when old man Olson got a gnat in his eye, and the mule wound up three counties away! (which sounds impressive, excpt that the Olson farm was on land where 3 counties came together, so it wasn't more than a quarter of a mile.) And of COURSE you can call me Vera! Any friend of old man Olson is a friend of mine!
Once upon a time, Farmer Brown was taking his blind donkey, Buddy, to the town market heavily laden with vegetables. On the way they met a traveler whose cart had fallen into the ditch by the road. The traveler asked them to help pull his cart out so, Farmer Brown agreed. He hitched Buddy up to the travelers cart. Then Farmer Brown shouted,"Go Walter, go; go Chestnut, go; go Boxer, go; go Red , go; go Buddy,go!"Buddy instantly started puling the cart out of the ditch and brought it onto the road. When asked by the traveler why he called out other names, Farmer Brown replied,"Buddy is blind, you need to trick him into thinking other donkeys are helping him pull out the cart. After all, he is both a lazy and a dumb ass."
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